Tell it about the wedding. You get the dress length for the dress code and the hour, six colours that go with the bridesmaids without matching them, what to avoid, and the dates to shop, buy and fit, counted back from the day.
Mother of the bride · formal · evening
Floor-length gownA formal evening wedding calls for a long evening dress, or a dressy cocktail dress.
Six colours to consider
- Deep burgundyJovani pairs it with dusty rose bridesmaids
- MauveJovani pairs it with dusty rose bridesmaids
- Deeper dusty roseA deeper version of the bridesmaids’ colour
- NavyA classic for the mother of the bride
- EmeraldA classic for the mother of the bride
- PlumA classic for the mother of the bride
- Bridesmaids: Dusty rose
- The bride: White or ivory
- The dates
- Add the wedding date to count back from it
Avoid
- White, ivory and creamThey are the bride’s colours, unless she asks for them. Near-white shades such as a pale champagne or a very pale blush can read as white in photos.
- The bridesmaids’ exact dusty roseYou would look like one of the bridesmaids. A deeper or softer version of their colour goes with them instead.
- Neon and very bright shades, including a loud redThey pull attention away from the bride.
- Black, unless the bride is happy with itIt is increasingly worn to black-tie and evening weddings, but some brides mind: ask her first.
- Traditionally the mother of the bride chooses first, then tells the mother of the groom, so the two dresses go together without matching.
- Go with the bridesmaids, don’t match them: a deeper or softer version of their colour, or a colour from the same family, and one that suits the wedding’s palette.
On Needle Style: Mother of the bride dresses · Updos for the mother of the bride · Half-up styles · Mother of the bride makeup
From Emily Post’s dress codes and the mother-of-the-bride guides of Jovani, David’s Bridal, Adrianna Papell and other dress makers, checked 2026-09-19. Ask the bride before you buy: her wishes come first.
Quick answer: at a black-tie or formal evening wedding, the mother of the bride wears a floor-length gown; at a daytime or cocktail wedding, tea-length or midi. Avoid white and ivory, the bridesmaids’ exact colour and anything neon; navy, emerald, plum and burgundy are the classics, or a deeper version of the bridesmaids’ colour. Start shopping 6 to 8 months ahead, buy by 4 months before, and have the last fitting 2 weeks before the day.
How to use it
Choose who you are, the wedding date, the dress code on the invitation, the time and the venue. Then tap the bridesmaids’ colour (or pick your own), the wedding’s other colour if there is one, what the bride wears, and the other mother’s colour if you know it. The planner gives the length, six colours to consider with the reason for each, what to avoid, and every date from the first shopping trip to the final fitting. Print it as a checklist, or copy the link and send it to the bride.
Mother of the bride dress length, by dress code
The length follows the invitation’s dress code and the hour, the way Emily Post sets out dress codes, with the dress makers’ guides from Alex Evenings, Cristallini and Jovani.
| Dress code | Daytime | Evening |
|---|---|---|
| Black tie | Floor-length gown | Floor-length gown |
| Formal / black tie optional | Tea-length or midi | Floor-length gown |
| Cocktail / semi-formal | Midi or knee-length | Tea-length or midi |
| Dressy casual | Knee-length or midi | Knee-length or midi |
| Casual | Knee-length or midi | Knee-length or midi |
On a beach, a tea-length or midi keeps the hem off the sand and still looks elegant. A midi or tea-length hem clears grass and uneven ground far more easily than a sweeping gown. For a house of worship: for the ceremony, plan sleeves or a wrap: some faiths expect covered shoulders, and a mother’s dress should never be see-through, plunging or backless.
What color should the mother of the bride wear?
Go with the bridesmaids, don’t match them: a deeper or softer version of their colour, or a colour from the same family, and one that suits the wedding’s palette. The classics, named again and again by the dress makers: navy, emerald, plum, burgundy, silver, mauve, sage, gold, taupe (Jovani, Belle Amour Bridal, Sophia’s Bridal and Adrianna Papell).
Jovani pairs each common bridesmaids’ colour with shades that go with it:
| If the bridesmaids wear | Consider |
|---|---|
| Dusty rose or Blush | Deep burgundy, Mauve, Pewter |
| Sage | Soft gold, Bronze, Warm plum |
| Navy or Slate blue | Silver, Charcoal, Muted copper |
| Terracotta | Olive, Deep teal, Warm taupe |
| Lavender | Eggplant, Slate blue, Dove gray |
| Emerald | Gold, Deep berry |
Colors the mother of the bride should avoid
- White, ivory and cream. They are the bride’s colours, unless she asks for them. Near-white shades such as a pale champagne or a very pale blush can read as white in photos. (Jovani, Jovani and Adrianna Papell)
- The bridesmaids’ exact colour. You would look like one of the bridesmaids. A deeper or softer version of their colour goes with them instead. (Jovani, Adrianna Papell and David’s Bridal)
- Neon and very bright shades, including a loud red. They pull attention away from the bride. (Adrianna Papell, David’s Bridal and The Bridal Finery)
- The other mother’s colour. The two mothers should go together, not match. (Adrianna Papell and David’s Bridal)
- Black, unless the bride is happy with it. It is increasingly worn to black-tie and evening weddings, but some brides mind: ask her first. (David’s Bridal and Sophia’s Bridal)
When to shop, buy and fit
| Step | When | Sources |
|---|---|---|
| Start shopping | 6 to 8 months before | Jovani, NewYorkDress and Lara New York |
| Buy or order by | 4 months before | Lara New York, Elegance Wedding and Jovani |
| First fitting by | 8 weeks before | Lara New York, Elegance Wedding and NewYorkDress |
| Final fitting | 2 weeks before | NewYorkDress and Elegance Wedding |
Alterations take 4–6 weeks, and the last fitting is two weeks before the wedding. If the wedding is closer than that:
- Two to four months: it is getting tight. Choose from dresses in stock, and book alterations as soon as the dress arrives.
- Under two months: shop in-stock and off-the-rack dresses only, and book the tailor as you buy — rush alterations cost extra.
- Two weeks or less: buy a dress that fits off the rack, and ask the shop about rush alterations today.
The mother of the groom
Traditionally the mother of the bride chooses first: ask for her colour and length, then choose a dress that goes with hers without matching it. The same dress code, lengths, colours to avoid and dates apply: choose Mother of the groom in the planner (David’s Bridal and Lara New York).
For the rest of the look, see Needle Style’s mother of the bride dresses and gowns, updos and half-up styles, makeup, and hairstyles for the mother of the groom.
FAQ
What color should the mother of the bride wear?
A colour that goes with the bridesmaids without matching them: a deeper or softer version of their colour, or a classic such as navy, emerald, plum, burgundy. Tap the bridesmaids’ colour in the planner to see six, each with its reason.
What colors should the mother of the bride not wear?
White, ivory and cream, and anything close to them, unless the bride asks; the bridesmaids’ exact colour; neon and very bright shades; and the other mother’s colour.
Can the mother of the bride wear black?
Often, yes: black is increasingly worn to black-tie and evening weddings. Some brides mind, so ask her first.
Should the mother of the bride match the bridesmaids?
No. Go with them without matching: a deeper or softer version of their colour, or a colour from the same family, reads as planned rather than as one of the bridesmaids.
Should the mother of the bride wear long or short?
Long, floor-length, for black tie and formal evening weddings. Tea-length or midi for a formal daytime or a cocktail wedding, and on a beach. Knee-length or midi for dressy casual and casual weddings.
When should the mother of the bride buy her dress?
Start looking 6 to 8 months before and buy by 4 months before, so there is time for alterations, which take 4 to 6 weeks. Book the first fitting by 8 weeks before and the final fitting 2 weeks before.
Who chooses first, the mother of the bride or the mother of the groom?
Traditionally the mother of the bride, who then tells the mother of the groom, so the two dresses go together without matching.
Sources, each checked on 2026-09-19: Emily Post Institute, Emily Post Institute, Alex Evenings, Cristallini, Jovani, Jovani, Jovani, Jovani, David’s Bridal, Adrianna Papell, Belle Amour Bridal, Sophia’s Bridal, The Bridal Finery, Lara New York, NewYorkDress and Elegance Wedding.